Road to recovery?

ECT treatment number six; I was well on the road to recovery last time. I seem to have set myself up for a fall by almost expecting to return to the ward with a spring in my step.  I feel worse than ever, far far from having a spring in my step I feel like my boots are lined with lead.  The weight of my thoughts as heavy as my heart.

If the risk from general anaesthesia is 1:80k my risk surely must increase with the number of treatments?  Good job I am not a mathematician or I feel sure that would secure me a nurse shaped shadow.

Being a smoking fatty again must put me at a greater risk.  I even ate a bag of chocolate coins (how very festive) before treatment five in the hope that by ignoring the nil by mouth would be enough to put me out of my misery.